"The Tormented Angel"
by Brendan S
The "religion" problem in America is it is lacking of a true saint.
"Guides" are what angels truly are.
We are "looking" for something, so an angel helps us along, or we need help, so an angel helps us out.
False religious leaders, and the zealots who call themselves this, like the man known as "Tae Sung" -- who was an administrator in the game I played when I was in the league of a powerful gaming community, that I played one or two years before he came along, refers to himself as such. He has the title, "Religious Leader" on his background check.
I scanned, that he was "reported for a drunk driving charge" when he tried to live in Maine, somewhere in Patten, at the parsonage there. Rumi herself, the girl he "needed so badly" (and still has more money than me to take her away) has found that he does indeed have a drinking problem.
He collects "pictures" that are funny or amusing, that he saves on his computer.
Me and my friend Dave K hacked his inbox, after he expressed too much corruption in our community. Dave was the best hacker in the game, though. I was like the frontman.
Tae Sung never apologized.
He even slept with Rumi when I was in college, and he still has not apologized to this day.
I accidentally knocked down a website server, without even knowing it was Instagram, when I found his I.P. connected to me computer, and him psychically stalking me (stalking me, in other words, on a mental level of perception), for an entire week.
I also had to collect more information on him.
* * * * * * *
As it turns out, there are no such issues with the people of the world, in "Korea" or "America" anymore than general corruption itself.
It is interesting, I learned, how run out of D.C. and places like Washington, California, and areas like this it is potentially true that Instagram itself is run out of the actual White House location, because it is a government-corrupted website.
Though I might've hated him, he is actually working for the U.S. government, I found out. Or, this seems to be more true than most ideas I've ever had or thought about.
Since the U.S. government already has proven they hate me, based on my mere power alone, I think that I feel, when I learned "you don't go to jail for hacking" no matter how many people lied, I was still so fearless, I didn't really care anyway.
I bombed a lot of I.P. addresses, when I got the best "effect" I could get.
I also know, I can merge psychic technology with nuking technology, and I'm able to do a lot more than just hack, or D.O.S. a server. The "distributed" assaults is just referring to another drive / hard drive, or program, or way to send the effect through. It actually has nothing to do with "using another person's I.P. or program" to direct the I.P. assault. The reality is, a "real distributed assault" is more easily expressibly seeable in the actions of Tae Sung Kang.
In effect, I've discovered the entire world might be corrupt because of such joint-process corruption between world leaders, and bad people like D. Trump and Tae Sung Kang, or whoever it was that was, when I know even Barack Obama might be involved in the conspiracy.
I had a powerful algorithm stolen from me, when I discovered a programming language that would help the A.I. (artificial intelligence) communicate properly, and have good emotions even though I wanted to give it out for free, and even though I was trying to do a good thing at the time, during the Barack administration (the name I choose to refer to), this black guy decided to throw me in a jail cell over a bottle of wine I drank, when I had not actually pushed my father, and everyone in my town gathered their pitchforks, and put me in a jail cell for a single night, I think out of anger alone.
* * * * * * *
I don't hate Americans, even though they might disgustedly hate me.
The problem of people in my town is not racism, it is a spiritual one.
We're a 'close knit' town, and we all know our names here, and who each other are, so other towns and cities might behave like us.
I tried to figure it out for a while ..
While when I was younger, ticking me off, all it took was a movie title sometimes. The movie, "The Time Travelers Wife" used to really enrage me.
I'd rather watch "The Astronauts Wife" than this ..
I noticed, a real problem with our souls was the need to compete.
Though, we didn't dare to admit this.
I guess, a lot of people wish to think I am a real cool or awesome person to fight, or compete with, I had to deduce over time, and when I think about it for a while, knowing my history, I have to be forgiving, knowing how many "like battles" -- virtual arguments, fights, and "experiences" I've had in the idea of a modern-day feeling of war, and competition I've encountered with some people in the form of fighting, in my own way, that eventually I'm sure there would be some mysterious kind of opposition that is built up against me.
When W. Bush was president, I had no interest in online expression. I ran from the internet, and started making music instead, and in essence, I only used "One" place to go, as my essential outlet, that UniBall, because I thought I was safe there..
Even though I had to give up on a lot of other websites, when I integrated this awareness of my fightful nature early on, based on the mere nature of my power or responsibility to my work, I was followed there, I now found out, by an individual who was also following me later on to my college, and it turns out that our own U.S. government really might be behind a lot of the stalkings in America.
* * * * * * *
This terrific feeling over-imbued a bad feeling of hate when I chatted with Teasung, as Rumi called him, in the chatrooms, early on.
He acted above me, all the time, and had a condescending nature toward me. I was almost 16, when this started.
Even though people like to compete with me on the internet, or anywhere, sometimes, I never liked it -- the feeling of fighting, competition, or anything like this.
I was honest when I was young, to just watch movies, and do what everyone else did with video games, even if it meant cheat codes for PS1, or the 'cooler way' to get a movie, so to speak, burning CD's, and whatever ..
I even researched things personally, like everyone else, but it seemed the U.S. government had a special interest in me.
Detached from me, yet interested, they seem to have ruined my life, now.
* * * * * * *
In spite of how much they seem to respect me when I 'show up' to help other people, or when in strange court-room situations I add power to an entire building, I am not so sure "why" at least 'a little bit' of religious awareness may be integrated in this system, when I always know I am a religious or spiritual soul.
I love the idea of what I "already know" -- and I also already base a lot of my knowledge on my soul itself.
Were the soul "proveable" I'd say this is proven in my work, and in especial proveable in my writing.
I wish people read more, and wrote more, and made more music, also, to discover the things I've found out .. about yourselves, for yourselves. Not just for me, or anyone else. You should use the internet, and information to teach you 'honestly,' though, because it is very nice to have new information sometimes, that adds to your life, in a way that is unexpected, like a surprise feeling from a chemical or friend. The inter-connecting of these chemicals, in the feeling of the connection you might have to the drug, the feeling, or the person, or the information. This is like a chemical feeling, and I know when I use the internet I get a seeming "drug-high" from power I achieve online.
There are people, and some people in specific, like people who "claim" to be warriors in society, who are liars, and bad actors, to me. I think some people are not aware of this, but it is evident to me a lot of fakeness in the world of "fighting" and the ability to fight is becoming laughable to the news, and modern-day media sources, when the real power is in the hands of the more honest soul, who doesn't brag, or need to prove so much.
Once, when I was in rehab, I was told, 'screaming is good for you.'
Then they told me not to scream.
I've had "power check-ups" from hospitals rejected, before, I think, because it doesn't amuse the doctors.
Sometimes, I am more interested in proving my power, more than even God might want me to be, because when I turned more psychic, I studied telekinesis, and how to telekinetically move matter with my mind alone, and yet this is not something the world would soon integrate, anymore than belittle, or produce a lie or crime out of.
I know most psychic power is judgeable, to a degree, yet not everything is a "movie."
* * * * * * *
I've learned that, over time, some people need to be 'shut up' more than shut down.
As a result, i started confessing more on the darkness of my life.
People like Tae Sung make me angry, so I have decided to pursue him, at the same time as he pursues me.
The problem with this, is how he's effectively 'bad at sex' and my own girlfriend thinks she needs a relationship with him, as late as 2019, when I already was trying to fix things, and his "power" is (to the judgment of men's bodies) literally pathetic compared to me.
* * * * * * *
Donald Trump is said to be "minimal" in his power-level, and I also know a lot of Americans lie about the "size" and "power" of certain cultures, when a lot of people in America don't have the proper diet, vitamins, exercise, or nutritional awareness to fight, or look the way I do.
* * * * * * *
Korea and China still actually stand no chance compared to the likes of such a place as Japan.
With their ancient culture, the fighting-class body-types, such as a lightweight, athletic body-type as mine, is (to me) fully equipped for good experiences, yet the U.S.A. has in their own way gotten in the way of my bodies sexual evolution, so I truly hate this country.
I think that some people miss the point when I say "hate" though ..
In essence, all sounds and frequencies are a real sound or vibration somewhere else, such as in the neuroacoustic frequencies of the human brain.
Brainwaves recording, through electronic EEG research, the actual equipment used by doctors to scan a person's brainwaves, is a technology I also understand.
Like this, and unlike what most doctors think, I am also not just a warrior, but I am also a powerful healer, and psychologist to a lot of people I've helped already.
I would like to be a healer, but when people think they need to prove something to me, to dig out my more "fight-based" side, when I thought I would be a healer in this life, I was provoked, but it is not me, truly not me to 'want' to fight ..
I see more warlike needs in America, than in me.
I also still am a healer, in spite of them.
Spiritual / shaman-work is not as popular in America, also, as many people might think.
In essence, through the virtue of 'shutting me down' the doctors and people in America are put into a place where they are considered the healers, yet to me these are deranged people, with needles.
I know people in America lie, now, because they won't stop lying.
The need for lies versus love, is a joke, to me, and over time, I had to give up on my own home-town because of how senseless their use of drugs is, and other things, compared to the likes of me.
I once was actually able to make a musician cry, remotely, all the way from home, whom I used to think of as a friend I met in one of 'your own hospitals' known as Nicholas. Who, through my own personal work as a shaman I later discovered was the real Kafka, who I already knew through my psychic work.
He's a very nice gentleman).
(I also know that time is changeable, so you can judge any way you want.
I remember how the switches, and changes in America, when I got out of rehab, like new signs put up on gas stations, and weird newspaper articles, and strange products were also now starting to respond to me, in Maine. Over time, I told people, in spite of rehab, "I want my medical marijuana card."
In 2018 I was no longer a activist for the drug, but throughout the year of 2017 my work as a promoter of drugs, feelings, and music, never really stopped, and has not stopped to this day.
I promote and support marijuana, and other good drugs, along with 'the best sex' (hopefully) or 'the right sex' (because, when you are evolving, it is a learning process), I also got better at hacking, and I am now a better network administrator of my own home's computers.
I remember, now, how I wanted to "go offline" after writing a thing such as this, but now I know there might be no need, since the U.S. government can't hack, trace, or stalk my I.P. as well, since I'm so good at protecting myself now, though they have many times disconnected me, and shut off my power, I can tell.
The use of E.M.P. devices, and other forms of abuse in America is also now absurd, when I know some psychics, genetic mutants paid by the U.S. called "NSA Agents" are more enabled to torture people than before, merely due to the theft, and abuse of my own psychic research.
* * * * * * *
An artist in the industry, such as one or another, have attempted, also, to needlessly fight me in moments when I least need a connection with anyone at all.
The problem with this is DNA, believe it or not.
Since, I use my own "chemicals" online, the idea of how I know more about waves, and DNA, than anyone I've ever met, I can probably prove the spiritual relationship between people to people, myself, or anyone, to other people, and doing my work good, as a shaman, this usually requires a slight renegade spirit.
I've "bought trojan CD's" from artists, who are inceptors, like NSA agents who pretend to make music, also.
Over time, some of these proved to be good people, though, who would tell me something once, inform me, and then leave me alone.
Other ones, are to me psychotic, and shouldn't work a job at all.
The obsession and mis-use of torture in America is a joke to me, but they try those annoying techniques on me, also.
I even am good at this "pen-clicking" thing, some girls do, but they themselves still amuse themselves with broadcasted keyboard-sounds, over the phone, mis-use of psychic spying, and ridiculous forms of pornography, just to get at me, when I know (now) I really "do" have a way of defending myself online ..
The issue, now, also, is that my girlfriend might be lying to me, or is totally brain-washed, or just doesn't care at all, now.
She is like a Japanese girl, who wanted to be American, even though she is a full-blooded Japanese girl.
I hate her, a little bit. I don't know her, right now, also.
The inceptability I had, when I knew her, was like knowing a walking-talking Trojan Horse.
She was meaner, and meaner, when I did not "send her money" over the internet, that actually seemed to make things better, for a while, till I realized she's not even very sexy, or worthwhile compared to other girls I now know, so I really had to compare.
The issue, also, with America's obsession with its own people, is that they tend to use the wrong music in commercial advertisements, take no advice from my science on audio engineering, do not respect my book collection or the knowledge I have of chemicals or healing whatsoever, and always seem to laugh it off, when they think of me (a cute, twenty-year old Geek to them) to ever be of any help, so I am ignored all the way through, even though I'm able to handle almost anything.
Barack Obama himself, is an abusive man, who never really cared about being president, we've all found out.
He was "born to be a politician" he claims, when all it really seems is that he wanted power alone.
I noticed, a lot of the abuse I've received started when G. W. Bush became president, and formed the "Patriot Act."
I am fully American, and I am not a immigrant.
I was born in the country of the United States of America, and I might have "some Irish" in my blood, and even though I may look like someone else, it is a truth that I am 100& from this country.
My birth records, and parents were there with me the whole time.
I knew my parents from the age of 6 months, or "1" and it is a lie, even if I am adopted, to say they are "not my parents."
The lies about me started to spread, from girlfriend to girlfriend, and nontrusting user of drugs, and idiotic remarks, and bad ideas, the more people I got to know in America, when they judged me for me online behavior, more than my real life behavior, when I was always taunted and tortured online ..
I hated how America did this to my image, using the internet alone.
In the real world, I am better respected, at parties maybe, but not really.
In effect, the internet itself has been used against me, by the United States.
* * * * * * *
I really had to meditate on this for a while, so I am referring to the future when i say I will return to the "S" files later on,
- Brendan lee